Okay, but lets write a contract, if you regret your decision at anytime, you get it all back, minus what I have spent of course, both I and my wife have always wanted to live in a house by the sea, hopefully you nearby. You know, I have never been truly happy because I thought I could change this world, now I know that I tried and failed, maybe I can change myself instead, they say that true change comes from within.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a mouse having sex? A spouse.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What makes a subaru a subaru? The fag thats driving it

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Is it normal to eat breakfastr in the morning? Yes By Logan in South Dakota

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A man walks into a bar at 1 in the afternoon. He's the bartender and a fellow employee asked him to cover the afternoon shift.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats the square root of pie? Pies are round.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

One out of every 3 smokers dies.................. the rest gain immortality.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

whats black and white and red all over? a zebra crossing after a horrible, horrible car accident

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what do you call two mexicans playing basketball? juan on juan

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's the difference between a woman? Apart from the differing reproductive systems and body organs, women are characterized by a need to create food.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A girl walks into a strip club, she was tired of her husband and wanted to see how it was actually done.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How did Jimmy get hit by the car? He dropped his Ice cream cone.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the car cross the road? Isn't that what cars do?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Where was the black child's dad? At work. He'll be back around 6:30

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A sober Amy Winehouse

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Sex

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A guy walks into a bar. After only 10 minutes, he leaves. The bar closes in 10 minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A man, a woman and their child wen to a restaurant. There was a horse in it and they left. The Holocaust begun

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Ian's mind Elevator music

thumb_up thumb_down -3

knock knock who's there? rude, interrupting cow rude, interrupting cow who? just kidding, its steve. cows can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down -3

FUCK THE JEWS

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Have you ever seen what Stevie Wonder looks like without his sunglasses? Neither have I.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops