What happened when an FBI agent and a cop argued over control of a hostage situation? Several people including a respected community leader were killed.

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Why did the black guy stop his car? There was a stop sign

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Why was little Timmy afraid of his dentist? Because he was 10 foot scorpion.

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how many birds did chuck norris kill with one stone? one.

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A ginger kid and his 5 friends walk into a bar

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She was a donut.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was a really creepy movie

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither Has He.

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What did the man in need of a prosthetic arm get from the hospital? A diagnosis for cancer.

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I had a really funny joke about a dead baby...but I threw it out

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He actaully never did. He only made it half way before a cop issued him with an infringement notice for jaywalking.

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What smells worse than cow manure? Burning Jews.

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What's worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two buses.

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How are jello and frankenstein alike? Both green, both alive, and bill cosby didn't make me want either.

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Your mother smells so bad that if she were alive in 1919 she would most likely be outlawed in the Geneva Convention or at least banished from conventional warfare among nations that adhere to the restrictions imposed by such a document

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whats a diffrence between a bench and a black person the bench is a thing a black person is a human being

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Q:Why was the frog sad A:He was stapeld to a boys face.

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Beating cancer. Guess Steve Jobs they didn't make an app for that.

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how do people without arms and legs have sex? no one has sex with people without arms and legs.

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Religion.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? a fridge was thrown at her

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in every apple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops