Roses are red Violets are blue I've got revenge And you got big boobs. :3 Roses are blue Violets are red I'm bad poet Now i'm dead. O_O

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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What does 1 black person on the moon mean? A problem. What do 2 black people on the moon mean? A problem. What does every black person on the world on the moon mean? It's still a problem.

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My son lost his first tooth today...so proud. Took my punch like a champ

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was blind.

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If she's old enough to count, she's probably in second grade.

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How do you make a boy cry? Kill his family

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A man walks into a bar. He then proceeds to get severe concussion, goes to hospital and dies three days later after suffering multiple brain haemorrhages.

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Why did the cow jump over the moon? To see outer space

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so an apple walks into a bar... I'm terrible at making jokes...

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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Why did jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms or legs Knock knock Who's there? Not jimmy

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What do an eagle and a gopher have in common? They can both fly, except for the gopher

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Where do you find a good lawyer? In the cemetary

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Tell my wife I died doing what I love... Not her

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my mom texted me telling me that my dog died... then she texted me the letters LOL... i texted back asking wat was funny!? she thought it ment 'lots of love' :p

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whats worse than having that Holocaust joke be the best anti-joke for months? Windows updates

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How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to change the light bulb and two to file a lawsuit.

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If Jewish men light a menorah during Hanukkah, what do Jewish women light? Jewish women light a menorah as well; Judaism is a relatively fair religion to both sexes.

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When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

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your mom's stupid face is a dumb butthead. I hate you.

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Whats green and smells like grass? Grass scented air freshener, in a green colored can.

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What's normally shaped like a rectangle, and is so thin, it gives people cuts? Paper.

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There are two bears in a shower. One bear says "pass the soap." the other bear says "no soap. Radio."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops