What does a dinosaur and TImmy's mom have in common? They're both dead

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My left foot has 6 toes, my right face has 8 Q-tips -Matt

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What's the difference between ice cream and babies? I don't stick babies in my freezer...

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A middle aged man goes to a psychic. She tells him that he has prostate cancer, and his wife has been cheating on him for the past 3 years.

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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A christian, a Muslim, and a Jew walked into a bar... Then the Muslim shoots the Jew and blows himself up.

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What's black, white, and red all over? Trayvon Martin and George Zimmerman.

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I hope you shut the others down before you called me by my name, otherwise this will convo will get fairly short.

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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Barbara Streisand

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you're mommas so fat that her doctor says she is morbitly obese and may die of a heart failure later in life

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Yesterday I was walking my dog and while I was walking my dog, guess what happened? It got hit by a bus.

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A blond is walking down the street when she is suddenly mugged and raped. She reports her attacker but he is never found.

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What's the difference between a chicken and a bartender? A chicken is a domesticated fowl, a subspecies of the red junglefowl. As one of the most common and widespread domestic animals, with a population of more than 24 billion in 2003, there are more chickens in the world than any other species of bird. Humans keep chickens primarily as a source of food, consuming both their meat and their eggs. A bartender is a person who mixes and serves alcoholic drinks at a bar. also bar-tender ; 1836, American English,

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three gay men were sitting in a hottub. a condom floats to the surface. why the hell were you watching them?

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Society wants to be so prude and pure that on AntiJoke, you actually get words like P U S S Y and P E N I S censored !

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Whats green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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-What did the policeman say to the boy? -Hello.

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Q: Knock, Knock A: To get to the other side.

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What do you call an African-American, Latino, Asian, and Canadian all on the same football team? A reasonably diverse group of teammates who are most likely good acquaintances.

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People say that shit don't stink But shit does stink It stinks like shit!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Actually, now that i think of it, roses come in many colors And violets are actually violet in color, thus the name

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Black people

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What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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