Which came first the egg or the chicken? The chicken because eggs can't cross the road

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All I want for Chrismas, the murderer of my parents to be caught.

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how many blondes does it take to fix a lightbulb? 764,983,792,545,653,

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Why did the postal worker go to work? Because he has to support his family so they do not starve like his dog.

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What did zero say to ten? I see you found someone

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What's the difference between shoes and a ginger? Shoes do the kicking.

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What did the cop say to the robber? You have the right to remain silent

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Did you hear about the blonde who jumped out off a bridge? She was clinically depressed and took her own life because of her terribly low self-esteem.

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Why mommy upset cause wet and sticky make mommy upset

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Why dont we just make fun of both? *mexican music plays*

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Johnny has 30 pints of ice cream. He eats 25 pints. What does Johnny have? Diabetes. Johnny has diabetes.

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What is Ash gray Battleship gray Black Blue-gray Cadet gray Charcoal Cool gray Davy's gray Payne's gray Gunmetal Silver Slate gray Taupe Purple taupe Medium taupe Rose quartz Taupe gray Timberwolf WhiteApple green Asparagus Bright green Cal Poly Chartreuse Dark olive green Dark spring green Dartmouth green Fern green Forest greenGreen Green-yellow Harlequin Honeydew Hunter green India green Islamic green Jungle green Lawn green LimePhthalo green Pigment green Pine green Pistachio Sea green Shamrock green Spring bud Spring green Teal Yellow-greenAlice blue Aqua Aquamarine Celeste Cerulean Cyan Electric blue Jungle green Magic mint MintAir Force blue Air superiority blue Alice blue Azure Baby blue Bleu de France Blue Blue-gray Bondi blue Brandeis blueAmethyst Byzantium Cerise Eggplant Fandango Fuchsia Heliotrope Indigo Lavender blush Lavender (floralblack gray silver white maroon red purple fuchsia green lime olive yellow navy blue teal aqua a List that you just spent 5 min reading

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Why did the girl fall off the couch? She had a seizure.

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What happened to the blind man who went skydiving? Nothing but the dog was unlucky.The dog kept squirming and he thought he hadnt gone down the cliff yet and said "ok fine dont come with me!".The dog didnt survive. :'(

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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Hey man how was your trip? great!!! It blew my mind

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Person 1: What's 2+2? Person 2: 4 Person 1: Oh, you already heard that one.

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Invisible Television.

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Why couldn't the Hispanic guy become a firefighter? Because the fire chief was racist.

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A black, a muslim, and a communist walk into a bar, the bartender says "what will it be Mr. President?

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A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: I guess nobody's home. (leaves.)

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Why did the black man run from the officer? The officer was trying to rape him.

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how do you wake lady gaga up? you hit her in the face with a frying pan

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How do you put on a condom Very Carefully

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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