Why did lil yazzy watch The Hills at 12:40 in the morning? Because she was casually surfing netflix and clicked on it.

How do you put on a condom Very Carefully

What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Vast. While they are both mammals belonging to the order Carnivora, and therefore have a loose evolutionary connection, dogs belong to the Carnidae family and cats belong to the Felidae family. There would need to be much biological research done to discover all of the differences that result from this.

Which came first the egg or the chicken? The chicken because eggs can't cross the road

What kind of cookies does a pedophile order from the girl scouts? Samoas...pedophiles love coconut.

All I want for Chrismas, the murderer of my parents to be caught.

how did the bloop cross the road? to get to the other side

A horse walks into a bar. The owner immediately seeks out the owner of the misplaced obstruction and asks them to remove it promptly less his animal suffers any more untoward damage

Chuck Norris was walking down the street when he was confronted by an armed, very desperate street robber. Chuck unfortunately made the decision to defend himself, and was shot in the gut before he could complete a roundhouse kick. The robber then took his wallet and ran off, undoubtedly to buy drugs.

how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

Why couldn't the Hispanic guy become a firefighter? Because the fire chief was racist.

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when riding on a roller coaster.

how do you kill a bear. -you shoot it.

What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? "Hey, what's up?"

Dylan Eichas

What do you call ten black men running down the street? A race.

Whats pink and looked like an angry bulldog? Your moms vagina last night

Pickup Line: Hay girl is that a mirror in your pants. Becuase I can see me in it.

Q: What did the first kid say to the second kid before he handed him a pencil? A: May I have a pencil?

how do you wake lady gaga up? you hit her in the face with a frying pan

One day a horse goes to a bakery store and asks the shopkeeper for a fresh loaf of bread. Surprised at the request the shopkeeper asked - White bread or whole wheat? To which the horse replied - Makes no difference cause i rode my bicycle to work yesterday.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cactus cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens butt.

Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes.

What the difference between a black man and a pizza? A black man is capable of feeding a family. A pizza is capable of feeding an American.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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