Why did the man jump out of the plane? Because the plane was losing fuel fast so he grabbed a parachute and went for it and realized that was the only one left so everyone died a horrible death.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

When was George Washington born? Who the hell knows. He's older than dirt.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock Knock Who's there? Xiao Kaan Xiao kaan who? Fu*k you ugly lauuhhh

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A White man, a Black man, and an Asian man go to Heaven. They were in a plane crash.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

I america you read books. But in Soviet Russa, Books read YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Who keeps his best friend in a gun rack? a red neck.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the little girl stop licking her Popsicle? A psychopath cut off her tongue.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what do you do when you see a injured black man screaming in pain rolling on the ground assist him or call 911 depending how severe the injury is

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's the hardest part of rollerblading? Telling your dad you're gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I have a pint or two.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the woman spray a black man in the eyes with pepper spray, then promptly run away? Because the woman was a notorious criminal and was currently robbing the man's house, but was caught in the act so she used pepper spray as her last line of defense while she fled from the scene before the man could call the police to detain her and put her in prison for her crimes.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple getting blow jobed by a giant squirrel

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A jew, a catholic and a muslim walk into a bar. The catholic man dies of a massive heart attack and the other two men mourn their friend for weeks.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Who wants $300? Me too.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

HOW DO YOU KILL A BLACK MAN? YOU DONT

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why is Joe is ugly? I dont Know

thumb_up thumb_down -6

-Children! Come inside! -Why? -We are going out...

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Cause she's a woman

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How do you become a dragon ball super saiyan? You sit there and scream like you are giving birth for three minuets

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the boy fall out of the plane. Because the plane was on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why was the girl stupid? Because she had a low IQ

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops