Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

Whats is pathetic and just plain sad? Gas prices these days.

A man walks into a bar, he is immediately rushed to the emergency room

Whats worse than the holocaust? Finding your babies head in a microwave

All I want for Chrismas, the murderer of my parents to be caught.

Why did the U.S.A. vote in a black president? Because racial prejudice is a thing of the past and the U.S.A. is a liberal and progressive nation.

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Their names, if you know them. If not just say "excuse me"

How can you kill a blonde? Hack her to bits.

Snapple fact #572: You're a terrible person.

John had 32 candy bars. He ate 28 of them. What does John have now? daibetes, john has diabetes.

What did the chicken say to the rhino? Nothing. Animals can't talk.

Wanna hear a joke? Good, go ask a comedian.

roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme this one doesn't

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

What happens if someones forgets to put the 'anti' next to 'joke.' It is taken by someone else and created into an anti Joke.

What did the tractor say to the cow? I'm a tractor, you're a cow, go figure.

What do you call something you should prepare yourself for when having sex with a prostitute? A.I.D.S

Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes.

Knock, knock. The man knocking finds a note taped to the door saying "we'll be back in a week", the man proceeds to walk back home and tell his wife that they weren't home and that he'll return the rake he borrowed from them next week when they're back.

What's black and white and red all over. An interracial suicide pact.

What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Vast. While they are both mammals belonging to the order Carnivora, and therefore have a loose evolutionary connection, dogs belong to the Carnidae family and cats belong to the Felidae family. There would need to be much biological research done to discover all of the differences that result from this.

GIVE

Why couldn't the morbidly obese lady order a cheeseburger? A: Because it wasn't on the menu

In Soviet Russia, there are communists.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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