knock knock whose there? my penis.

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What did little Susie give to young Billy on Christmas? Genital Herpes.

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Have you ever been to Uranus? Well I heard it's nice this time of year.

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why did the owner of Google decide to name the company "Google"? google it..

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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What do you get when you cross a man with a horse? The Nobel Prize for your advancement of genetic sciences; centaurs aren’t real.

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Why do black people have nightmares? Because we killed the only one with a dream.

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hey i just met you and this is c r a z y , but im a pirate so call me matey ;)

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A man walks into a bar, sits down and talks to the woman sitting next to him. The woman took out a cigarette, and offered one to the man. The man said yes, even though he never smoked before, because he was trying to get with the woman. They smoked a few more before the woman left, and the man left shortly after. The man became a chain smoker and died 1 year later from lung cancer caused by smoking multiple packs a day.

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Two nuns are in a bathtub, one nun turns to the other and says "where's the soap". The other nun replies "it does, doesn't it".

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A poor boy receives his first wrapped present in his entire life. Why did he hate it so much? Because it was a copy of "Mien Kampf" Is he Jewish? No, he actually does know what "Mien Kampf" is because he is poor and cannot read.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven eight nine

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What has eyes but cannot see? A blind man.

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What's worse than being forced to drink your own urine and eat a disabled kids poop? James Holmes (Ironic that the text I had to type in to post this was "I'M BATMAN".)

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How does he keep getting girls to sleep with him? Bear-traps..

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Your mum so ugly that she isn't married

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Rebecca Black and Justin Bieber get married.... Friends and family attend the wedding

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In Pokemon, why are bug types super effective against dark types? Because Ebola affected a lot in Africa.

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Why did the man start vacuuming his neighbor's floor? He had to get the GSR

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What's green and has wheels? A frog in a wheelchair

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Why do they call Jean a redneck? Because her neck was red from being in the sun for so long.

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If somebody chucks skittles at you saying taste the frickin rainbow Run over them with a car and say "NationWide is on your side!!! ????

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What did the blind, deaf and dumb boy get for Christmas? Cancer

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Your dick is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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