hey! did u just fall??? ..no..gravity wanted a hug.!

Why did the little boy cry? His entire family was shot and killed at his elementary school play including his 6 year old sister who has down syndrome.

Q: What do the French call a quarter pounder with cheese? A: Le Royale with cheese

just in time?

What's harder than steel? Beating Tetris. What's harder than diamond? Beating Tetris...

If you eat a brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundae, your tastebuds will likely turn purple and move to France, where people don't eat brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundaes.

Why did the man starve to death? He had no food.

What did the anorexic girl say to the skilled psychologist? Fuck off you'll never understand me.

A duck walks into a bar, but he is kicked out because he is not 21

Knock Knock ? Whose's there ? The person you should be opening the door for The person you should be opening the door for who? Oh my god Frank open the goddamn door

Did you hear about the kid-napping in Minnesota? He woke up

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Sex

What do you call a puppy with one eye, one ear, and one leg? An ugly mother f*cker.

My wife came up to me and said, "I want you to make me scream with 2 fingers!" So I poked her in the eyes!

Why did the girl get run over by a bus? The bus driver was blind.

Q:What happened when the bear walked into the bar? You cannot answer because you were seriously injured by the bear.

What did the girl say to the mute? "Why are you so quiet?" How did the mute respond? He flipped her off.

A jewish man walks into a bar and then gets hit in the testicles. he now has testicular cancer.

A doctor rides in his Mercedes Benz through a rough, poor part of town. He sees a homeless person who is begging for money. The doctor stops and gets out of his car and asks "Ill give you some money if you need it for food". The homeless person then shoots and kills the doctor, takes his wallet, and buys crack.

Why did the guy playing Monopoly sell Boardwalk for $100 to the woman wearing an exotic outfit which shows off her boobs but wouldn't sell Boardwalk for $1000 to the other person that was playing the game? The other person had Park Place as well which would have given them a monopoly on the blue property if he had sold it to that person. And $100 is all the girl had or he would have asked for more but he needed the $100 in order to pay this other player and keep himself from going bankrupt after landing on one of his Hotels.

I was chatting to a woman in a bar, when the subject of kids came up. I said, "My son has had to wear nappies for his entire life." "That's awful," she said, "what's wrong with him?" I replied, "Nothing. He's two and a half."

What do you get when you cross a squirrel and lasagna? I don't know,I'm asking you the question.

it smells like up dog in here. whats that?

What did the man do after he got in his car with out his keys? He started it up and drove Away

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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