"Ask me if I'm a lamp." "Are you a lamp?" "No."

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I walked up to the door and I asked the door how r u door, and he said, I'm a door!

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hi dave

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why did the older man give candy to the little kids? he was in a parade

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Q:what does jgjdhter hjldhgukrh mean A: it means something it is a real word

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Why does life hand you lemons? Because it sucks enough, so it wants you to have some.

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What starts with the letter P and ends with 'orn'? Porn....

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Why do women go to the bathroom together? To clean their filthy pussies.

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What do you get when you cross a helicopter, elephant, and a rhino? Heliphino

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What did the tide say to the sea?ANSWER-- Long time no sea. LOL Issaiah from OHIO yolo

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An American and Russian are arguing about their country. The American says "I can do things you can't. I can walk into the White House and into the Oval Office. I can bang my hands on my President's desk and say "Mr. Obama, I don't like the way you're running your country." The Russian says, "I can do that." The American says, "No, you can't." The Russian says, "Sure I can. I can go to Vladimir Putin's office and say "Mr. President, I don't like the way Mr. Obama's running his country."

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Why was the lady afraid of cooking? Because her husband always beat her with a frying pan

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what happened when a chicken laid an egg? it died

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A apple is red a banana is to never mind that joke sucks

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It's Christmas in Iraq. Merry Christmas

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A black man checks his watch. He sees that its 3:50, and calmly carries on with his day.

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Q:What's the difference ethernet a corvette and a pile of dead baby's? A:I don't have a corvette in my garage

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Jews

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I forgot.

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Why didn't the door open? Because it was locked

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do you have a pen i can borrow? yeah, here.

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I used to be schizophrenic, but we're ok now.

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Chuck noris is so awesome that he brings a knife to a gun-fight, and wins

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Penis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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