Person 1: What's 2+2? Person 2: 4 Person 1: Oh, you already heard that one.

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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What makes women so mystifying and beautiful? Tits.

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What do you get when you cross and elephant and a dog? Nothing, because you cannot breed creatures of different geniuses.

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Whats pink and looked like an angry bulldog? Your moms vagina last night

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because it's head's so far from his body.

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What is marios favorite type of jeans? a brand that he enjoys and feels is comfortable in

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Always bring food to the zoo. It's not the animals who placed the signs not to feed them.

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Two muffins are in an oven. Muffin 1: Gosh it's hot in here. Muffin 2: Holy Crap! A talking muffin!

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Whats worse than breaking your pencil? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

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What did the rock say to the other rock? It didnt

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What do you call something you should prepare yourself for when having sex with a prostitute? A.I.D.S

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a guy who can fly walks up a hill and jumps off a cliff. his flying power fails him and he dies on impact

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A chicken crossed the road and the farmer said, "Where the hell is that chicken going!?"

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? I had gay butt sex.

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hi hi strager danger

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face." the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer."

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smug face >:}

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Q: How do you get a clown to stop smiling? A: Hit it with an axe

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse doesn't reply because horse can't talk.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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What did andy say when he went down on burger nips? Welcome to the jungle

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty-six year olds? They're of legal age to give consent.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops