Why did god create planet earth? He isn't real.

Why did the gorilla fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

How do you know a blonde's been in your refrigerator?? There's lipstick on the cucumber!

Why did the priest fall onto the alter boy? Because he lost his balance

Yo mama's so skinny, she should probably go in for eating disorders' counseling.

an average-looking woman walks into a bar. nobody really notices.

what do u call a man being beaten in the street the cops

What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? Their both purple. except for the rabbit

What color was the black guy's skin? Brown

What did Hitler say when he was dying? He said, "I'm dying."

There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

A guy watches a porno. When it is over, he said; "Wow, that was deep"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It tried. The chicken was run over by a distracted driver. The chicken turned out to be Farmer Brendan's prized egg hen who wandered away. The hen provided a large portion of Brendan's income and living. The farmer, deprived of his vital income source, was forced to sell his farm and live on the city streets.

Why did the giant try to eat the magical rainbow? A: Because the apocalypse is predicted for the Wednesday after santa gets shot by the evil jolly ice cream man which in secret is cheating on his wife who in turn eats every human baby ever known to man. duhhhhh

My brother found a worm in his apple. I dared him to eat it, so he did. When he tried to swallow, the mashed up worm congealed in his throat, killing him. Later, I found out that the worm had poisonous rectum fluids. I was given the Nobel Peace prize.

What's the difference between a pair of slippers and a pair of dead babies? Essentially nothing.

A horse walks into a convenience store. He grabs a pack of gum, pays the man at the counter, and walks out.

Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But I have a gun, So get in the van

A duck walks into a bar. In the middle of writing this joke I realized that there were already jokes like this so I stopped writing this one.

What is worse than a worm in you're apple? Two worms in you're apple.

a black guy walks into a black bar

There's an Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman. They are all trapped in a jail cell. Eventually they all starved to death.

What's slower than mollasses? Your fattass mother!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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