"MR PLATT!!!!!!" "Yeah?" "Telephone for you sir." "Oh, cheers Tony."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let out the chicken?!?

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Why is wood brown Because wood is brown

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whats sad about 4 black people in a cadalic fallign over a cliff? it wasnt there car

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How many apple does it take to turn a fridge into a water buffalo? Yellow tactics because of the Minty fragrance

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To make it home in time for Thanksgiving.

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There are 2 muffins sitting in an oven. One muffin says "Damn, it's getting hot in here." The other muffing replies "Holy Shit! A Talking Muffin!"

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- Mommy look, I built a sandcastle! - Who cares, you have cancer.

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What did the racist black man say to the white man? Nothing they both died in a car accident.

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A Jew, a Muslim and a Christian walk into a bar. The Muslim is dissatisfied with the choice of the meeting place since the Islam forbids drinking alcoholic beverages.

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A man was driving in his BMW one day when a mini passed him out on the fast lane. The BMW driver thought 'i can't have that!' so he sped up and overtook the mini. Unfortunately he wasn't paying attention and he drove into the back of a school bus. Ironically the bus contained the mini driver's 3 daughters, he was driving so fast because they had forgotten to bring their lunch and he was trying to catch up with the bus so he could give them their sandwiches. There were no survivors of the crash, except for the mini driver.

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whats worst then being raped tortured and killed? it happening to 500000 puppies DX

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What do a dog and a fork have in common? They both have tails. Except for the fork.

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how do you kill a rat skin it and feed it to your child and wait till it shits then when it shits feed it to your dog then when it shits then microwave it and shove the smelly liquid remains up your ass.

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A Blonde walks into a bar. She is in an abusive relationship and drinking her pain away.

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Why does Santa Clause say Ho Ho Ho? He has Tuberculosis.

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Roofs are Red...I have a Cunt!!!

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What's worse than getting AIDS? shaking hands with a liberian doctor. Knock Knock Who's there? Ebola

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How do you get a one handed man out of a tree Wave

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Your Adopted Deal With It!!!

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Why did the man say ow? He got his dick caught in his zipper.

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your momma's so ugly that she currently deals with an overwhelmingly self consciousness view of her appearance to the point where she has contemplated suicide and it is in your best interest to seek her medical help in order to preserve her heath and overall well being.

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What do you call a man with no legs and no arms on your doorstep? Matt

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what do mexicans need to survive............. a truck load of herowin and BOARDERS!!!!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops