Why did the boy fall of the swing? Because he had no arms!

Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

what do you call a Palestinian with a large blade at the throat of an Israeli? a barber

Somebody else besides you: what time is it? You: what time is what? SOmebody else: ? What?

What do you call a chicken with the head of a shark? A genetic anomaly.

Was that last joke funny? Well this one isn't.

How do you put a baby in a blender? Feet first, so you can see its expression. How do you get a baby out of a blender? With chips.

Why did the fall off the building? ... because I pushed her

Why did the woman scream when she saw her brother? Because he had just come back from fighting in the Iraq war and she was extremely happy to see that he's alright

The funniest thing about this joke is that by the time you realise it doesn't say anything its to late to stop reading it

What's the difference between a duck?

How do you wake up Lady GaGa you set her alarm clock to a reasonable time

Why was the black man in school detention? For sleeping in and showing up late accidently

What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

Hitler walks up to a little girl at a concentration camp: - How old are you? - I'm turning 7 tomorrow! - Nope.

-Will you follow the live coverage of 86th Acacemy Awards? -No. -Are you anti-semitic?

ask if someone wants to hear a joke then say "never mind"

How much wood would a wood-chuck chuck, If a wood chuck could chuck wood? A full study has never been commissioned into the amount of wood chucked by a groundhog and thus far remains an unknown quantity. ls

Roses are red Violets are blue I kill children dont worry about it

a man says "whats shakin bakin" to a friend, but his friend was shaking, because he often has seizures... thats what was shakin

oh no, i've lost my tractor

Why was the house painted pink? I dont know, why don't you ask the owner?

Whats worst than being raped by a black guy? Being raped by two black guys? You racist i'm calling the police.

What is the best joke ever? 1D

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...