What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

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I don't like Holocaust jokes. Anne Frankly they offend me,

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Yo mama's so fat, she weighs 283 pounds.

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69

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What do you call a magic owl? HOODINI only some will get it...

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How long does it take for a dead baby to explode in the microwave? I don't know; I was too busy masturbating.

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what do you get when you use heroin aids.

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What did Britney Spears say to the Mexican? Hit me baby Juan more time.

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What did the boy get for his birthday? Older.

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Why are rich people so rich? they're not poor.

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What is square and grey? A grey square.

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Why won't the carny let the black kid on the carnival ride? He doesn't meet the height requirements

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A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

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What is yellow and bright? The sun.

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hello

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How do you change you dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel.

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So, two people park their car and walk into a bar. Wait, no. They were walking into a grocery store and they were riding skateboards, not a car. Then, the kid walks in after them. Oh, did I forget to mention they had children? And also, they're married. So anyway, they walk into this grocery store, and meet a barkeep. Wait no that's ridiculous why would a barkeep be in a grocery store. Let me start over. Bah.. never mind. I forgot what happened next, but it was REALLY FUNNY!

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a sloth? Everything. The blonde is a human being and humans are way different than sloths.

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There once was a man from Nantucket who lost most of his savings by making bad investment decisions.

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Why did the deer cross the road? The overpopulation of man has caused an expansion of construction into the habitat of the deer and it has required him to occasionally frequent human populated areas.

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What was so sad about the white woman who dropped her Starbucks? It fell on her baby in a nearby stroller giving it third degree burns, disfiguring its face.

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Executioner: Would you like to make a statement? Mr Murderer: Yes, I would love to sing a song. Executioner: Very well. Begin. Mr Murderer: There were 6 billion in the bed, and the little one said roll over, roll over. So they all rolled over and one fell out...

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A man walked into a bar. He was meeting his friends but was 30 minutes early so he went down the road to buy some food. He had recently began dieting after watching a series of lifestyle programs which informed him of the potential risks involved with high cholesterol and blood pressure levels. He purchased a garden salad and a freshly squeezed orange juice, and made it back to the bar in time to meet his friends.

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What's the difference between camping and molestation? I wasn't taken camping as a child

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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