Why did the chair fall off the cliff? Well it is an inamitate object so it did not move itself, someone must have threw it

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What do you get when you cross Jesus with James Woods? Crucifixion

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what has two legs and is red all over? half a cat

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What's yellow and goes up and down? A banana in an elevator.

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I just lied when I clicked the 'I have read and agree to the Terms of Service' to post this when in fact, I didn't read it at all.

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A chicken , a dog and a horse walked into a bar. There were going to the vets but were confused.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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What does a nun and a hat have in common? Size

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If you are stranded on a deserted island would you eat your hand or the 5 star meal you butter prepared? -Matt

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Why did nobody like the famous singer? Because she was Rebecca Black.

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yo mamas so fat whenever she wears a pink bathing suit people say "look at that fat lady wearing a pink bathing suit!

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Why did little Sally throw a stick of butter out the window? Sally has a burning hatred for dairy products.

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dude ur such a bon of a sitch

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Why did the blonde throw her alarm clock out the window? Because it was broken.

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Phew... it's gone.

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A Blonde walks into a bar. She is in an abusive relationship and drinking her pain away.

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Why couldn't the man get a job at the daycare? Because he was a serial killer/rapist.

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I am so good at sleeping, I can do it with my eyes closed.

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what do mexicans need to survive............. a truck load of herowin and BOARDERS!!!!!!!!

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile. get in the batmobile.

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Face...the other white meat!

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chuck norris multiplied by zero equals zero.

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Several men are in a bar a tall white man named James orders a round of shots for all of the people they all have a fun time untill James gets into a car with Derrick who is not sober they drive right into a sick childrens hospital and cause many frantic wild fires throughout the town. They all end up in jail for an unrelated cause

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops