There were three men standing outside. They were enjoying the nice weather.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Gary: Stick your tongue out and say "I live in a pirate ship" Bruce: *sticks tongue out* "I lib inna pile of shiiit."

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What Is big, round, and looks like gaben. Gaben!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

> Why wasn't the chicken able to cross the road? > Because he had severe autism and was Ambulophobic.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you say to a hamster? 42 and weasels

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the black guy say in the phone? Hello

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Larchmont Park is the biggest shithole in the european union - Only the jippo part tho, lots of flies live in that part <3

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Whats the difference between a truck full of dead babies and a truck full of bowling balls? You can't pick up the bowling balls with a pitchfork.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

how do you kill a rat skin it and feed it to your child and wait till it shits then when it shits feed it to your dog then when it shits then microwave it and shove the smelly liquid remains up your ass.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Friends are like snow; they disappear when you pee on them.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

The teacher hands out tests to the students and some of the students say to the teacher "what does 'no grade' mean?" The teacher responds, "Oh I need to grade them still.")

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: Why did the black man call the white man a rasict? A:because he called him black.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Hey babe, are you a refrigerator? -No... Good--'cause I wanna f*ck you so hard. Best pickup line. Always works.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you get when you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence in prison.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's funnier than the pope in a speedo? Humor is subjective, so answers vary from person to person.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why is your mother dead? because i killed him.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Guess what my dog can do? Bark.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Yo mama's so fat, that when she jumped, gravity pushed her back to the floor!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why does the chicken cross the road? 4

thumb_up thumb_down -7

An oriental man starts a new job. He is told to go to the Supply cupboard and bring back some stationery.He is gone far too long so his boss sends another man to see what is going on. The oriental man had a fatal stroke in the supply cupboard and was unfortunately dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you get your clock to stop ticking? Hit it with a sledge hammer.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops