And more;

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An incoming freshman introduces himself to his Ethics professor by saying, "What's up?" To which the professor responds, "You should never end a sentence with a preposition." The freshman, who is both clever and witty, quickly responds to his future Professor, saying: "Professor, I practice linguistic description, such that I observe language objectively in a way that does not adhere strictly to grammatical and syntactic dogma". The professor, surprised by the student's philosophical disposition, engages the student in a highly constructive dialogue about the philosophy of language, from which both the student and teacher learn more about each other and themselves.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A. Treadmil

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What is black and blue? A pen with reversable ink.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ?... because he was dead

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Q. What happened to the kid with 1 arm and 1 leg and 1 arm and 1 leg A. He had a seisure, then got hit by a bus

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Q: Why did George Lopez walk into a Taco Bell? A: To purchase a 5-layer Gordita Burrito

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one day i went on a swing, somone pushed me and i fell broke my leg,cracked three ribs, cut my lip, fractured my toe and died of internal bleeding to my brain.

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? i know how to make a pizza

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What's worse then the Boston bombing? The Texas bombing, considering Texas is a much bigger region then Boston.

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Three people are stranded on an island. They didn't want to eat each other because they were friends. They died of starvation.

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Why did the student cry when he got an F on the test? because his dad beats him.

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What do you call a person mowing a lawn? A Mexican

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It's that time of the month again... ...to cut my toenails.

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whats the difference between friends and cement? if you soak friends in liquid and then repeatadly shock them they will die

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what happens when you piss on a dead monkey nothing you just lose the urge to pee O.o

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An Arabic Muslim is on a plane. He's flying to Chicago.

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Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because the branch broke.

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Why did Sally fall of the swing? She had Down-Syndrome.

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What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after being hit by a train.

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what does a black person and an elephant have in common? what? they are both living beings who have their place in the world.

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How do you spell orange? O-R-A-N-G-E-U-D-U-M-B-A-S-S

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roses are blue, violets are red. I am color blind

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How do you make a baby stop crying? You slit it's throat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops