A man and a friend are playing golf one day. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer. His friend says: "Wow! That is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You are truly a kind man." The other man replies, "Yeah, well, we were married 35 years."

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Why was Hellen Keller afraid to answer the phone? This situation is impossible because Hellen suffered from scarlet fever, therefore she could not see or hear the phone.

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a red boat and a blue boat collided all the survivors still have nightmares to this day

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a boy fell in mud... a kid took a bath with bubbles... bubbles was the girl next door!

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why didn't the chicken cross the road. Because it was hit by a truck.

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your mama so fat she should go see a doctor.

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Roses are, blue, Violets are red, Screw poetic forms, I wish you were dead

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What starts with a 's' and ends in 'ex'? Sex -XH

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My title of old was Satan. You humans killed my brother, ending God the holy trinity`s stay on earth, the Gods Omega. Moral: And yet you call ME? THE ANTICHRIST?!? I OFFERED HIM WATER! YOU OFFERED HIM TORTURE AND DEATH!

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A black person walked up to another black person, and tells him a pun the other black person laughs and walks away

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How long did the Hundred Years' War last? 116 years.

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Q: What's the answer to this question? A: The question to this answer.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Johnny Johnny who? Johnny your son let me in mom! Son, I have something to tell you. What? Well, you're actually adopted *sobs*

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ur mum

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Knock-Knock Come in! ...

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what did the boy with no arms get for christmas? A pair of robtic arms and now he has super stregth so he fuk up any body who said he would get cancer.

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Why did the chick cross the road? To get to the brothel for hot lesbian love.

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I have two friends, Jeffrey and Barbara. You might think that Jeffrey likes sports and beer, and that Barbara likes knitting and cooking. But you'd be wrong, Barbara is dead.

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why did the little boy die? He had AIDS

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How many chinese women can you fit in a car? About the same amount as men.

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What did the boy say when he got hit by a car? Nothing, he punctured his lungs.

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Why did the blond paint in the nude? because she couldn't find her clothes, and wanted to express her emotions through art

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Two octopuses are swimming in the ocean. Suddenly a scuba diver spots one of the octopus. The octopus looks at the human and swims away.

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Why did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Because you touch yourself at night

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops