What do you call a woman that is on her period? -A girl that is expirencing a difficult to control flow of blood through the clitorus.

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So lion bites off a mans foot. He bleeds to death.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? Neither has he.

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how do you confuse a blond? put them in a circle room and tell them to sit in the corner

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What happend to the boy with no family? he died in a tragic car accident along with his family

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What happened to the turtle that was on land Dead

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Trust me, you are that kind of girl, and no, you are not nerdy, you are open and down to ground, while your beautiful exterior means a lot to me (I am a man, its the way I am), I would never have wanted to talk to you or even less visit you with a pack (make it five packs) of condoms, if you where the awkward Asperger kind of gal, so how old are you, like seriously?

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knock knock who's there? it's I, your son. ....... what? dad let me in, it's cold! i don't have a son.... but.... i love you... get off my porch, my son is dead to me. (whimper, fading footsteps)

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the Shell Station.

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How can you tell if there is an idiot at a dogfight? When someone pits a Chihuahua. How can you tell if there is a moron at a dogfight? When someone BETS on the Chihuahua. How can you tell if there is a cheater at a dogfight? When the victory goes to the Chihuahua.

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just two, but I'd like to know how they got in there.

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fjasdklfjklasdjfasdfk .... sorry i have terets!

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Why is an elephant gray Because it's GRAY!!! duh

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why did the cow say "moo"? because he's a cow and that's what cows say.

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Your mother is so stupid she couldn't get a passing score on a standardized test.

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roses are red violets are blue i am bipolar so am i

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Roses are red, They are also violet, yellow, white, pink, orange, purple, or orange.

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Turkey Balls

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You are the most beautiful person in the world.

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What is green, brown, has four legs and would kill you if it fell on you from out of a tree? A pool table

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What is black and white and sleeps a lot? A tired zebra.

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How do u get Hitler out of a car? You open the door.

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2 + 2 = fish

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops