Whats the difference between a Bicycle and a duck? They Both have handlebars, except for the duck.

How do you sabotage someone's car? Drop a fridge on it

What do Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder have in common? They are both blind.

a black man and his girlfriend are in a car, who is driving? the cop

yo mamma so fat that when she goes out in high heels she comes back in flip flops

What's the difference between a dead baby and a pineapple? There will be no funeral for the pineapple..

Why couldn't the black man participate in the running category of the Olympics? Because he had no legs, he was referred to the Special Olympics, instead.

A Chinese kid fails his math test.

what happened to the 4 year old girl who got stuck in the freezer? She froze.

What's worse than getting a fly stuck up your nose? Been alone in a hospital room with Jimmy Saville.

ass.

There once was a man from Madrass Whose balls were made out of brass This was incredibly uncomfortable and embarrassing for him. It also affected his sexual potency and rendered him infertile, Which drastically affected his ability to enter and sustain relationships with women.

Q: What did the tree say as he fell? A: Studies have shown plants in general do not have a voice box, thus making plants incapable of speaking.

There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

What do you call a women with 2 black eyes? Hopefully nothing because abuse is something that shouldn't be messed with and it is wrong.

You: Hey, I have a good knock knock joke, here, you start! -and if all goes well...- Them: Knock knock! You:Who's there? Them: Uhh...

You know, people are kind of like trees, they tend to fall over when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Evicted.

What did the three sixteen year old boys do to the homeless man late at night? Wished him a happy birthday and gave him a meal

An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar... However, it's really busy, so they leave and go to a different bar.

What does a hooker eat for breakfast, lunch, and dinner? Food.

What happened to the little boys house? It burned down. How did the boy die? In the fire.

Q: What kind of bees make milk? A: None. Bees make honey, not milk.

"why did the cheese not go to church on sunday" "because it was jewish"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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