Q: What would you do if i pushed you down the stairs A: I would suffer from serious head injuries thus filling you with guilt for performing such a deed.

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Why did the man walk into the grocery store? Because he had run out of peanut butter

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A rabbi and priest both go into a bar... and they each had a responsible number of drinks before walking home.

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What's blue and looks just like water? Water.

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Where are you going Your house

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A man walked into a bar Ouch!

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Yo mama is so fat she has a gym membership and a diet plan to lose weight

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Why does Mario grown on shrooms? Because they bloom inside of him.

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Mario goes home after a hard day of work and finds his entire family killed and a note from Bowser... He is now an asshole who beats and rapes kids...

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Life gave me limes. Now how am I suppose to make lemonade

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Why wasn't Will invited to the party? Will has been dead for 3 years.

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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Q. What happened to the kid with 1 arm and 1 leg and 1 arm and 1 leg A. He had a seisure, then got hit by a bus

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Q: Why did George Lopez walk into a Taco Bell? A: To purchase a 5-layer Gordita Burrito

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What do you get when you cross a pumpkin with a kangaroo? An irrelevant punchline.

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Why does a man wake up every morning to do the same job over again? Because, wait... what the heck kind of a question is that?

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The other day a man came to my door. After I opened it, he told me, "I'm sorry, your mother is dead." He paused, then said, "Just kidding." "Actually," I told him, "my mom died two years ago of natural causes." He turned around and left, and I closed the door. All in all, it was a very confusing situation, and I'm not sure how I feel about it.

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What happens when a right turn is finally made in NASCAR? The driver has successfully changed his tires and has been refueled, now he is pulling out of pit lane.

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Why was the girl sad on her Birthday? She found out she was adopted.

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What's worse than getting dumped? Being molested by a crazy hobo

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

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Q: What happens when you sit in the middle of the road? A: You get hit by a car and die a horrible death as your family members mourn in the loss and remain sad forever.

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What's worst than the Holocaust? No Wi-Fi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops