One day in Africa there was a family of Americans touring an African village. They were a happily married couple with a four year old son. This day however was a very sad day because a group of elephants came trampling through the village. The couple left there kids inside and went to help control the elephants. however the elephants killed them all with their feet. Now the little boy wandered outside because after all he was just a little boy. He was about to be killed when a baby elephant calmed down his mom, so he saved his life. The baby elephant then took the little boy back to the airport by which the married couple came because elephants are very smart. The boy didnt want to leave his new found friend the baby elephant but the little boy was then sent back and lived with his Uncle. When he was older, he had a child of his own, a little boy. One day he decided to take his son to a circus, that was from Africa. He didnt realize there would be elephants there. This day the elephants got spooked by a mice and started to stomp all around. Then the man realized his son was missing. He looked down to find his son about to be stomped on by this old elephant. Just as the elephant was about to stomp he and the man made eye contact. The man thought noticed the look in that elephants eyes, like he reconized them. He thought mabye, just mabye it was the same elephant he was saved by. Turns out it wasn't and the elephant killed his son.

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Why are women so obsessed with not having penises? I'm serious. Imagine an ordinary woman out there, who is not doing any of the activities that the women-not-having-penises thing is famous for. But I can pretty much guarantee that under her clothes at that very moment, she isn't having a penis. And for no good reason. Sometimes I suspect women keep up the no-penis thing even in their sleep. Frankly, I find that creepy. Why are women so obsessed with not having penises?

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. Steven Hawking is disabled from the neck down. I lied.

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Why did the baby die, because he got herpes, so did his mother, there both dead now.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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A Mexican, a black guy, and a Muslim are riding in the back of a car. Who is driving? Their friend Keith.

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What did Hitler say to Mussolini? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was being taken to the slaughter house

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Why was the little girl crying in the woods at night? There was psychotic killer chasing her with a chainsaw.

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what happens when you piss on a dead monkey nothing you just lose the urge to pee O.o

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GAWS SI EKOJITNA

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Your mother is so fat, that recent test results have proved she is morbidly obese.

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Yo Momma is so fat she is at risk of contracting Type 2 Diabetes.

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If Selfish Sam has twelve cookies and Tricky Todd asks for three then how many cookies does sam have left? Twelve. Remember he's selfish

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did you stub your toe?

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Whats worse than dying? Nothing.....?

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Why did the little girl cry in school? Because she remembered her parents were both in prison. She is in a state run foster academy.

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Where did the AIDS victim go on vacation? To the hospital.

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And the girl said: "I'll be ready in 2 hours!"

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Why did the man walk into the grocery store? Because he had run out of peanut butter

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk in to a barber shop They each ask the barber for haircuts of their preference.

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Why did the Mexican mow his neighbors lawn? Because the Mexican was 12 years old and his neighbor was paying him $20 to mow the lawn.

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Unless this event results in you being a vegetable.

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Why didn't the black man eat lunch? Because his lunch asked him not to eat it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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