- Anti Joke

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse doesn't reply because horses don't speak. However, he is confused and scared by the unfamiliar surroundings. Trying to escape, the horse breaks his leg. The horse must be put down.

What's worse than no wifi Nothing.

what did the african boy get for christmas - not food

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems make sense. 5

A: Do you like it B: No

You're flying above the Kansas Ocean, you lose your brakes and have to paddle all the way to shore. How many dogs can you fit on a carousel? Blue, because Ice Cream is cold.

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What's worse than getting dumped? Being molested by a crazy hobo

Q. What happened to the kid with 1 arm and 1 leg and 1 arm and 1 leg A. He had a seisure, then got hit by a bus

How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It's an obscure number you've probably never heard of.

what do get when you throw a penny in between a jew and a mexican? nothing besides one less penny

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Roses are red...

What do you call a fish with no fins? Dead.

A very rich man had a son. He was very proud of his son. The son was smart and diligent and did well in school. On the son's 16th birthday, the father went to his son and said "son, you are the apple of my eye and I'm very proud of you. I am a very rich man and since you have made me so proud I will buy you ANYTHING you ask me to buy you for your 16th birthday." The son, without hesitation, asked his father for 1,000 green golf balls. The father was taken aback. "But son, that's such a strange request! Might I remind you that I'm VERY rich, and I could buy you ANYTHING your heart desires?!" But the son was adamant, and his father, though confused, honored his son's request. Some years later the son graduated from college at the top of his class. His father, once again beaming with pride, came to his son. "Son, you are the apple of my eye and I'm very proud of you. I am a very rich man and since you have made me so proud I will buy you ANYTHING you ask me to buy you for your college graduation." The son, without hesitation, asked his father for 2,000 green golf balls. The father once again was confused, and a bit angry. "Son, that's a ridiculous request! I'm offering to buy you ANYTHING you want! I'm a very rich man, and almost NOTHING is beyond my requisition! So please, reconsider, and tell me what you REALLY want!" But the son was adamant, and his father, though bewildered and frustrated, honored his son's request. Years later, the son, following in his father's footsteps, was a very successful businessman. He'd married a beautiful wife and borne his father many wonderful grandchildren. One night as they ate dinner in an expensive restaurant, his father said to his son, "son, you are the apple of my eye and I'm very proud of you. I am a very rich man and since you have made me so proud I will buy you ANYTHING you ask me to buy you in honor of your fantastic success and wonderful family." Once again without blinking his son asked for 3,000 green golf balls. Enraged, his father slammed his hands on the table and yelled, "WHY MUST YOU MOCK MY GENEROSITY SO?! FINE; YOU'LL HAVE YOUR STUPID GOLF BALLS, BUT YOU HAVE LOST YOURSELF A FATHER!" And so the trade was made; the son's strange request for the animosity of his once-doting father. Several years later, the father and the son not having spoken once since, the father got a call from a hospital informing him that his son had gotten into a terrible car accident and was dying. Forgetting all about his grudge against his son, the father flew down to his son's side in a flash. His son was conscious for the first time in days as his father arrived. "Son, you are the apple of my eye and I'm very proud of you. I'm so sorry for disowning you! I know I never should have! I'm so sorry for the years we've lost! But I must know, son, why did you want all those green golfballs; those wretched orbs that drove us apart?! Surely you had a grand design for them; you're the perfect son and I could not have asked for anything more in the world than you!" His son, on death's door, looked into his father's eyes and said weakly, "well, father, I-" And then he died.

what is red, black, and blue all over? A horribly painted room.

yo mama is so fat that wii fit puts her in the overweight category

What's worse than losing a contact Having a bloody stool

Can everyone please stop posting shit about my girlfriend because it seriously isnt cool.

what's a fish with no eyes and out of water? its just a fish

Why didn't children go to their grandma at summer? Cause, they were hit by a car earlier that year and they are dead.

I walked up to the door and I asked the door how r u door, and he said, I'm a door!

book 'em danno

Why was the black man in Jail? He works there as a correctional officer.

why didn't the unicorn have a horn? It was a horse. Why didn't the horse have a horn? it was not a unicorn.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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