What did the prisoner receive on his 44th birthday? Well obviously all mail in prisons is checked, but nothing dangerous was found. He received a book on different types of steam engines (he is a railway fan), some chocolate (galaxy caramel, which is his favourite), a crossword challenge book (he gets bored in his cell) and the anti joke book.

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Why did the man murder his wife in cold blood? Because she was alive before he killed her.

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A straight black man walks into a gay bar.

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How do you know when Taylor Swift is dead? When you don't hear Boyfriend songs anymore

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have a gun, shut the **** up.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. Knock knock? Whos there? the Chicken.

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guess how...chicken pow! guess who...chicken poo! guess when...chicken pen! guess where...chicken hair! guess what...your adopted.

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How many dead children can you fit in a garbage can? Give me a knife and i will find out

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? It didn't, a cookie is a food, therefore it doesn't have working organs.

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Why did the black man get a life sentence in prison? Because he was involved a mass stabbing in a night club London which saw 4 local teenage girls lose there lives.

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Arron Glass

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When Life throws you lemons you might be hallucinating

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Why's the sun red? It's not it's orange.........retard

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whats green can fly and has legs? a plane i lied about the legs

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Knock knock. It's me, the ratboy genius.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? What? No? I'm here to inform you that your child won't be coming out of that coma, I'm sorry.

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A black walks into a bar Because it is still around the time of segregation, they don't serve colored people

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An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have a few drinks, then go to a club, where they amuse each other and those around them by completely slurring their words in their already very strong regional accents. Then they get a taxi back to the house of the Englishman as he lives nearest, and stay the night. The next morning, the Scotsman and the Irishmen walk home as they are still hungover and do not wish to risk driving.

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Why did the black man work at a Kentucky Fried Chicken? Because he was fired from his job at a grocery store, and it was the only job he could find on short notice in the current job market.

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*Tell your listener to say knock knock* B: Knock knock A: Who's there? B: *awkward silence

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Why did the mammoth cross the road? For financial reasons.

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What did the volcano say to the other volcano? Nothing, Volcanoes are inanimate objects that do not possess the ability to speak.

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What happened to the peanut who went to New York City? He got a-salted

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Roses are red, Sometimes they're thorny, When I'm around you, I get kind of Horny

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops