How Do Bulls Drive Cars? They cant, they have hooves making it impractical for a Bull to Drive a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Your mama's so old that typical places of business grant her the senior citizen discount.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red violets are blue poems don't have to rhyme..... Refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -13

how long does it take for a black woman to shit? a couple of minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Vast. While they are both mammals belonging to the order Carnivora, and therefore have a loose evolutionary connection, dogs belong to the Carnidae family and cats belong to the Felidae family. There would need to be much biological research done to discover all of the differences that result from this.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How do Elmer Fudd take a shower? Without a shampoo, he's bald..

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Yo mama's so fat that I make Yo Mama jokes about her!!

thumb_up thumb_down +172

A married man takes the ring off his finger.

thumb_up thumb_down +76

What did andy say when he went down on burger nips? Welcome to the jungle

thumb_up thumb_down +36

A sheep goes up to to a horse and asks "Does you speak sheep?".The horse replies ''Neigh''.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Q:I finished my Homework A:thats what she said

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A man walks into a store and asks for a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Q: A black man is walking down the street with a television, where did he just come from? A: Best Buy, he just got a bonus, and wanted to reward himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why a warm-harted man turned into cold-blooded? He's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why didn't the chicken cross the road Because he did

thumb_up thumb_down

Why mommy upset cause wet and sticky make mommy upset

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was 15 afraid of 16? Coz 16 was bigger than him.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a with no arms and no legs floating in the water? About to drown.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q: What do you call a black person that flies planes? A: A pilot you racist

thumb_up thumb_down -24

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

So there's this boy who really love clowns. His room is adorned with circus and clown posters and his one dream is to go to a circus and see a clown. One day he sees an ad in the newspaper for a circus that was headed toward his town. He begged and pleaded to his parents to let him go, and when they finally agreed he was ecstatic. The boy was in awe of all the things that the circus held, elephants, lions, tightrope walkers and trapeze artists, but there was nothing he was more excited for then the main show with the clowns. He took a seat and out came the clown on a unicycle. The boy was having the time of his life, when the clown suddenly called for someone from the audience. The boy immediately ran to the center of the stage. The clown asked the boy "Are you a horse's head?" then held the mic to the boy. "No," he replied. "Are you a horse's mouth?" "No." "Then you must be a horse's BUTT!" The crowd erupted in laughter and the boy was mortified. He ran out of the circus tent and vowed never to return. He grew up with a hatred for clowns and even had to see multiple therapists. 30 years passed and the boy was now a man. The man looked in his morning paper, only to see that a circus was in town. He decided he would visit one last time. There it was, the elephants and tightrope walkers. And then he saw it, the same clown from 30 years ago in the same show. He walked up and the clown asked the same questions. "Are you a horse's head?" "No." "Are you a horse's mouth?" "No." "Then you must be a horse's BUTT!" Then man the took the microphone from the clown and said, "Screw you clown."

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Why was the manspenis big Cause he was a lucky bastard

thumb_up thumb_down -60

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops