A duck walks into a bar "Can I have some brandy, please" says the duck The bartender then proceeds to make millions because he was the first to discover a talking duck

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What's worse than a rainy day? Rape.

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Why did the weiner dog have a bad childhood? Uncle Monty put his foot up its arse on a daily basis before chewing dorris's nose, ears and eyelids.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeleine mecanne.

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A black man,a Hispanic man, and a white man are in a race. The white man wins because he took steroids and used somebody else's urine for the drug test.

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A mormon walked into a bar and realised it was a bar the he leaves

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What did the man say after being hit by a bus? Nothing he is now dead.

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why did the monkey buy a shoe? to put em on!!!!

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Why to lawyers wear neckties? It's part of the uniform.

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Why did the black guy buy a bucket of KFC? Because he was hungry

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What's more funny than an anti-joke? A joke.

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DID YOU HEAR THE FBI INVENTED A TELEPHONE THAT THEY CAN USE TO CALL THE DINOSAURS? ITS TRUE! Them DAMN DINOS REFUSE TO PICK UP THEIR CELLPHONES THOUGH! Nero: This is not completely accurate though, a T-Rex called us twice actually, but he just kept roaring, making communication impossible... ...That sad moment when you post a totally non ofensive joke, then to tell you that I might your father, me or one of the sixthy guys that bukkaked your mother which was sucking off a dog and... Anyway problem solved!

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If I was trapped in a closet with you and a bear, and I only had two bullets, I would shoot you twice!

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Why are Jewish men curcumsized? Because Jewish women wont put their hands on anything that's not 20% off

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What's funnier than the holocaust? Pretty much everything, the killing of 6 million people was a horrible part of our world's history, and is no laughing matter.

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3 like an eel

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I'm on a seafood diet. It consists of prawns and tuna.

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What do you call a moving tree? A hurricane killing thousands of people and 3 dogs.

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How do you stop a black man from spitting? People of all races and colours are quite within their right to spit on their own property whenever they wish. However if anyone spits on or near you, you could report him to the police, but don't expect to be taken seriously.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the Shell Station.

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Whats worse then getting shot in the leg? Getting shot twice in the leg

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Me - Ask me if I am a Frog. You - Are you a Frog? Me - No.

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i said call 911 and they said whats the number?

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You can tell I have many friends because I got them to like this.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops