Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

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Your mom is so fat that when she wears a yellow raincoat outside, people notice a rather large woman who is enjoying the weather and wearing a yellow raincoat.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the dog cross the road? To eat the chicken. Why did the police officer cross the road? To tranquilize the dog and the chicken.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Buttercups are yellow Thats about it

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Wanna hear a joke......... your moms face !!

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So this Horse walked into a bar... Just kidding, it was Sarah Jessica Parker.

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hey! did u just fall??? ..no..gravity wanted a hug.!

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What do you call a car that doesn't work? Broken.

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A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. “Mother, where do babies come from?” The mother than explains to the daughter the logistics of sex. The daughter seems to comprehend and walk away leaving the mother to cook.

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What's black and white and red all over? Nothing, because if it's black and white, it can't be red.

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whats worse than a repeated antijoke the people that complain about them

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What did the penis say to the other penis? What? Penis motherbucker

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One cow, determined to make a difference in the world, gets killed in a meat packing plant. We killed him, and we killed his dreams.

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who is awesome? no one...

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An old lady says, "Oh i see now." The guy standing next to her says, " Honey oyu know im blind right?"

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what the difference between ET and polish people? ET is an alien and polish people are human

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So there's this big ass moose, and he walks into this grocery store, & asks the cashier "which isle are the potatoes in?" the lady replies, "down isle 5." so the moose walks down to isle 5 and there weren't any potatoes!

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how do you punish helen keller? leave the plunger in the toilet.

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why did the f a g perform fellatio? because he was a sick c unt

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Why do they call it "Unsweetened Tea?" Did they put sugar in it and then take it back out again?

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Two people were playing Monopoly. One was a blonde and one was black. The blonde said, "your turn".

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Q: What did Bob want for dinner? A: Cheese Burger, Fries, Coke, No Beverage

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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getting up in the morning is the 3nd hardest thing :DDD

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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