Knock knock I don't play games, go away! Knock knock How did you get in my house? Knock knock Stay back I have a weapon! Knock knock What are you!!! Knock knock Oh god, someone please help! Knock knock What do you want, I can give you money. Knock knock Just don't hurt my family, please. Knock knock!!! WHO'S THERE!!! I am.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Two straight men walk into a gay bar and promptly forget why they went to a gay bar when they are both clearly heterosexual.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

???????????? ???????????? ???? ???? ???? ???? ???? A wild EXEGGUTOR appeared!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see monkey do. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the second monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

It was at the war and there was a camp site where a doctors helped injured soldiers. One soldier comes in the door and holds his arm. The doctor says "You got shot in the arm?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and holding his shoulder. The doctor says "You got shot in the shoulder?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and was dragging his left leg across the floor. The doctor says "You got shot in your leg?" The soldier says "No, I stepped on dog shhhttt."

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the fridge say to the watermelon? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A man dreamt that he was eating a marshmallow. He ate his dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How can you tell when a African man is lying? Like any other person you would use a lie detector.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What happened when the Mexican put the Popsicles in the fridge? They melted

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the giraffe say to the human? Nothing, but it was trying to alert the human of an oncoming bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Roses are red Violets are blue These are facts that many people know

thumb_up thumb_down +14

whats worse than 10 babies in a blender 1 baby in 10 blenders

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Knock knock. Who's there? 9/11. And you said you'd never forget.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

If at first you don't succeed, there's a very substantial probability that you failed.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

how do you tell a politician that you hate him? politicians can be female, too.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Smelly Indians.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

yo mamma is so fat when people look at her they say "you're fat"

thumb_up thumb_down +12

a preist sees a rabbi on the street while taking a walk. he says hi and proceeds to have a nice conversation as they are good friends despite their religous differences

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What is fat and ginger? No...Not Garfield...Rebeka Tims

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a Mexican that doesn't have a lawn mower? An honest working induvidual that just so happens to live in the city and does not own a lawn mower

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Knock Knock Who's there? The FBI. We need to check your house for dead bodies.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops