Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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a

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Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

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Want to hear a joke? I'm sorry.

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Why did the mans nuts itch he had crabs

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Why did Dumbledore fall off the astronomy tower? Because Snape killed him.

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Michael J. Fox asked me if I wanted my drink shaken or stirred, did I really have a choice?

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Why couldn't the dog fetch? It's back legs were useless after it got run over.

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish.

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Why did the man walk into the bar? He wast thirsty.

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If at first you don't succeed.... maybe skydiving isn't for you...

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Why did Nicholas Cage cross the street? To steal the Declaration of Independence.

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A little boy asked his mom what fucking was, so she showed him.

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Roses are gray violets are gray everything is gray because I'm color blind.

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An Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They enjoy a few quiet drinks while watching a rugby match between Italy and France on the big screen, which is why they came into this particular bar. The Englishman hopes Italy will win, the Irishman is also supporting Italy while the Scotsman is up for France. France wins the match and the Scotsman says "Good game lads eh?" The others agree.

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Why did the girl drown? Well, the girl probably did drown because she was within the ages of 3-5 years old, and she probably had a physical incapapbilty and she could not swim so her parents didn't save her.

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What's 2+2? It's certainly not 1.

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Why did the girl pee her pants? She was only 1 month old...

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Q: why did the girl fall off the swing?? A: because she had no arms or legs.

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where can you find a monkey, a blond, and a bear? the zoo.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your doorbell is broken.

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Why did the old lady start crying? Because her daughter was raped and killed.

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Why did the blonde driver crossed the red light? Because she has a good notion of physics and realized that the truck that was behind her was too fast to stop in time and if she braked there could have been an accident.

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SNAPPLE!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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