How can you tell if a man is choking? Stick a fridge down his throat

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K

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Q: Why did the kid cross the playground? A: To get to the other slide

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A man walks into a bar. Now he needs stitches on his forehead because he was walking pretty fast

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Knock knock.. Who's there? Breaking. Breaking who? Im breaking up with you.

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Friend: What do you call a farting dog? Me: A canine releasing built up pressure as a result of excess carbon-based gases produced by the synthesizing and decompositional digestive reactions in the stomach and intestines. Friend: ... Who is a nerd, pointless, has no social life, and cant take a joke? Me: No one. No one but you is that exceptionally lacking in character.

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Roses are red violets are blue, I have no pickup line, just Get your tits out

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Q: What's funnier than a baby in a blender? A: A baby in a clownsuit in a blender.

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A muslim is working quietly in his 3rd floor apartment complex bedroom. ~~~~ He's been working on high explosives for 8 months now, preparing to kill innocent people.

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Q. What is worse than being raped A. Being raped twice

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What did the elephant say to the whale? Nothing, neither can talk and they live in very different biomes.

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Whats a welfare? Its what keeps you alive.

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yo mama has one big titty and one small titty and the call the bitch paul

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Did you hear about the kidnapping? Well you should be very concerned because he hasn't been found in 4 years.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dieing in a hole.

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Whats 89 x 67? Sponge. Whats 10 + 9? 19 Whats 9 + 10? 21!

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Roses are red Violets are actually purple You should probably see an eye doctor.

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Three guys at the beach decided to bet on who could swim the farthest. The first guy, could not swim so he lost. The second guy got a cramp right away. The third one swam far away into the distance, and was not seen or heard on for days... Three weeks later his corpse was found floating by the shore. The other two died out of guilt.

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We are as to jokes as atheists are to religion.

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a dedicated fat guy joins a kung fu dojo he is asked to dedicate his like to his kung fu the fat man dose not he is already dedicated to being a fat guy

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Miss Hoolie: Hello, PC Plum. What's the story in Balamory? PC Plum: I'm arresting you for the sexual molestation of twenty children.

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Nope, but yeah Felix looks a lot like Mickey Mouse, I think, nah it was Oswald the Lucky rabbit I believe, and he used to get his ass kicked by... Damn, what`s the name of the fat cat that beat up Mickey in steamboat willie?

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i hate black people

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A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. Why? A. To get to the other side. A. Knock, Knock. B. Who's there? A. The chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops