What did the Muslim do when he got on the bus? He realized he was in the wrong place and got on a plane and blew it up.

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Hey, i just met you. And this is crazy! But im on bathsalts ! *GAUH* Your face looks tasty!! :D

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Q: What do you get when you cross a cactus and a platypus? A: I was wondering the same thing.

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Xbox One

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How do you kill the circus? You chop it's head off.

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What happens when two black people go into a store with masks on? They buy candy for Trick-or-Treating

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How many anti-jokes does it take to change a light bulb? Since anti-jokes are not concrete objects, any change would have to occur metaphorically or abstractly. The number of anti-jokes required would then be irrelevant.

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A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

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bologna

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Why did billy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender

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What happens if a Muslim leaves their bag on a bus? They quickly return onto the bus and get it.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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What's the most famous anti-joke? This one.

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I’m on the new Seefood Diet… I can only eat Fish or shell fish

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What is both blue and yellow at the same time? Green.

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Dani Barton is not that! She is a great girl with a strong heart and feelings. The statement below is a joke, hence why it was published on AntiJokes. This is NOT a joke however.

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "A door to door salesman. Are you unsatisfied with the way your dish soap handles your plates? Then I have the product for you!" "I'm not interested in your product, but thank you anyway." "No problem. On an off note, how did you hear me? I didn't speak very loudly when I said knock knock, and I didn't even bother to knock on the door or ring the doorbell." "I have really good hearing." "Oh, okay. And for future reference, maybe you should open the door when talking to a visitor. Then body language gets established and the conversation flows more nicely that way." "That's some good advice, and I'll take it. Thanks, salesman." "You're welcome. On to the next house."

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What's worse than having your t.v. stolen by a Mexican? Getting raped with a chainsaw.

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and a rock? The rock doesn't cheat on it's wife.

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Tunechi

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Did you hear about the guy in town living in a tyre, he got a puncture now hes living in a flat.

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Where do cows go on the weekends? The slaughterhouse.

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A priest, a paedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. And that's just the first guy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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