Q: How did Muhamid Ali ( casius clay ) get a black eye? A: He was born

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A seal walks into a club...

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Q: Why did Megan Fox cross the road? A: Because she was running from a giant Decepticon!!! Why else!!!???

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Whats plastic and phonie a phone

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whats green can fly and has legs? a plane i lied about the legs

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Grass is green, Trees are brown.

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What's black, and hangs from trees in my backyard? Blackberries

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Just call the fire department, they're trained for that kind of stuff

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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What's worse than dying? Living in Africa

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Why did the man murder his wife in cold blood? Because she was alive before he killed her.

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Why was the little Jewish girl sad? Because neo-Nazis killed her family.

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What do you do when you come across a tiger in the jungle? Wipe it off and apologize.

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Your mom is so ugly, she buys groceries at the grocery store.

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How do you know when Taylor Swift is dead? When you don't hear Boyfriend songs anymore

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Why'd I have sex with your mom? I'm your father and I love your mother very much

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Q. Why did the friend say to the other friend "Your soo gay!" A. Because he was gay..

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Cause he's dead.

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An Irishman walked into a pub and ordered a pint. He had planned to just have one but ended up having two since he'd had a rough day at work. His wife was slightly annoyed that he came home smelling of beer.

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OK, A plane carrying 200 passengers crashes on the border between America and Canada. Which side of the border do you bury the victims? Well, it would depend on where the passengers where from or what they had stipulated in their living will. I suppose some would be cremated which opens up a whole other can of worms entirely.

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why did the guy drop his umbrella........ because he was getting raped.

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How many dead children can you fit in a garbage can? Give me a knife and i will find out

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Why a warm-harted man turned into cold-blooded? He's dead

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Did you hear the one about the Gay Irish Politician who was running for President?! He withdrew his candidacy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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