What do you call a deaf man? It would be unwise to call him anything, as he would have difficulty hearing you.

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Why did the bartender tell the black man to "Get Out"? It was 4 a.m and the bar closed at 3:30 a.m an honest mistake by the man.

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How's a raven like a writing desk. you really are alice.

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What do you get when you cross and elephant and a dog? Nothing, because you cannot breed creatures of different geniuses.

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i did not type this on 12/23/11 at 8:49:47

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how do you kill a bear. -you shoot it.

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A: How do you make a fire with two sticks? B: Ask your mother, we did it last night.

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Womens rights

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What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pliot.

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Why did girl cry? Because she recently saw the messy demise of her parent's marriage.

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how are a plum and a rabbit the same? they are both purple except the rabbit

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How do you kill a blonde ? Shoot her in the head

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Women's rights.

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why do women wear perfume and make-up? 'cause they're ugly and smell bad

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Why does a black man break into a car? Because he had closed the windows and locked his keys inside.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The pen was left open, and it felt slightly curious.

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what did the teacher say to the kid? you failed the kid cried.

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A Jew and a Nazi have dinner together...... they both immensely enjoyed the wine.

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Two muffins are in an oven. Muffin 1: Gosh it's hot in here. Muffin 2: Holy Crap! A talking muffin!

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If at first you don't succeed.... maybe skydiving isn't for you...

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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A young boy is concerned about his fathers health, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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