So a guy goes to his doctor because he thinks he has an STD. He asks the doctor "how bad is it doc?" to which the doctor replies "Well, I got the test results and it doesn't look good. You've got chlamydia, gonorrhea, and onomatopoeia. The guy asks "What's onomatopoeia?" The doctor replies "It's exactly what it sounds like"

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him, "Would you like a drink?". The horse cannot understand english and is confused by its surroundings. The horse gallops out of the bar knocking over a few stools

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I forgot my joke about gamblers, but i bet you would have loved it!

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Three men are all in a car park and they all want the same parking spot. As it turns out, it was a trolley bay

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I can be considerate if like someone is burning to death and I was the one considerate enough to lit them on fire... Wait no, I am considerate towards my friends (which are all ladies, all men besides me are obstacles and nothing else) AAAAND my logic processor broke down. Anyway, please do me the honors, take the last message.

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How do you shoot an eagle? You don't. The eagle is going too fast for you.

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What do you call Helena… A Shady palm tree

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What would Steve Jobs be doing today if he were alive? Dying.

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I did not thumb this up myself!... *click* Whoops! At least I am not that douche Moral Man eh? Moral: Whoops! Now if I just don't accidentally type in the answer and...

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Knock knock, who's there? Doctor. Doctor who?

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Are you one of those gay rapists that flame around telling people no all the time?

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Woman's Rights

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Q: Why can you not thumb up your own comment? A: "You've already voted" douche...

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Why did the 10-year-old boy get on the computer? He had to finish a project for Social Studies, and it was due the next day.

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What did one muslim say to the other muslim? Nothing, muslims are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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I'm dressing up as a shia for halloween

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There once was a baby named Paul Bunyan who was as big as a house. His mother died at childbirth.

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what did the asian father say to his son after getting a c+ on a test? son you are working hard and i know you will do well

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penis haha

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ahmadinejad. Well then get the **** away from my door!

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people can be soooo loud!!!!!!! sooo loud that they wake up helen keller!!!!!!

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Justin Becnel falls off a tree, what happens? He breaks his neck and unfortunately dies.

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What's dry and unpleasant to eat? Sand.

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What do you call a black guy robbing a store ? A theif

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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