Roses are red Zombies are hungry and blue My brain is half-eaten And what about you?

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An American and Russian are arguing about their country. The American says "I can do things you can't. I can walk into the White House and into the Oval Office. I can bang my hands on my President's desk and say "Mr. Obama, I don't like the way you're running your country." The Russian says, "I can do that." The American says, "No, you can't." The Russian says, "Sure I can. I can go to Vladimir Putin's office and say "Mr. President, I don't like the way Mr. Obama's running his country."

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A schizophrenic walks into a bar. He has dual personalities and does not realize that he has murdered his family.

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roses are red violets are too im bleeding

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Why is the post under me so funny? Because the boy won't be able to play the x box!

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How do you make a plumber mad? You tell him that his princess is in another castle about a thousand times over 25 years.

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bill goes to the room.. why? to fing a broom riddle boz full of burtiouse.

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this site is an antijoke

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Q: Why did the black man break into the house? A: Because he was poor and couldn't afford his daughters cancer treatment.

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One day Rebecca Black was driving down the street in a brand new convertible Luckily a policeman pulled her over after observing that she was far too young to be driving a car. Underage driving is a serious offense and should not be endorsed in music videos.

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Why did the black person eat fried chicken Because fried chicken tends to be an abundant food in the African American community and that was the quickest and cheapest weekend afternoon food source nearest to his house. It is also found in many other communities throughout the country and even the world. Oh yeah, he was hungry

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Why couldn't the man read? Because he was illiterate

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How many girls does ittake to screw in a lightbulb? Doesnt matter as long as dinner is on the table by 6:00

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What is a Will And Dan put together A WillDan HAHAHAHAHA

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knock knock, Whos there ? ( runs away ) trololololololololol

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What happens when a guy walk into a school and shoots kids? Oh sorry, to soon?

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Whats worse than a fart joke? A queef joke.

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Why did the Mexican jump of the roof? Because he had a serious meth addiction that was destroying his family and he could not live with the awful things he did to get his fix.

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What's green, grows in my basement, and if fun to smoke? Mold. I lied about it being fun to smoke.

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2 Penises

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Why did the scarecrow win the nobel prize? Cos he was out standing in his field!

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An Artic Storm.

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why did the goat go up the ladder? because its ladder goat

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What did the fat lady order at McDonalds? Nothing because she forgot here wallet at home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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