What sinks quickly to the bottom of a river? Your dead parents.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Me. May I come in?" "Yes, you may."

thumb_up thumb_down +16

why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress why is there all this blank space?

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the chicken cross the road? I wouldn't consider Mark a chicken. In fact, given the high speed and volume of cars traversing that particular road in both directions, I'd say it was a ballsy move. In hindsight, though, he probably should have waited for the "walk" symbol to appear for pedestrians, in order to avoid being run over by a bus. Anyway, if Pastor John would like to say a few words before we finally put Mark's body to rest...

thumb_up thumb_down +16

roses are red violets are blue a pyschorapist just ate me refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Let's ride bikes!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What is 1+4x : No i will not take my pants off!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the dog get arrested? He didn't the people responsible for causing the dog fight got arrested for animal abuse.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

The WNBA.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the daddy hamster say to the baby hamster? Nothing. Male hamsters eat their young.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's is the worst thing america has done? Jersey Shore, We mad those idiots rich.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

You know what's really long? The bread lines in Africa

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the baby fall off the swing? Because i hit it with a bat.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

knock knock whos there boo boo who why are you sad my wife has cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +16

There is a very old lady at the bottom of a long flight of steep stairs with a large amount of groceries piled up in her hands. How did she make it to the top?? She walked.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why couldn't the prostitute give a proper blow job..... She had no lips

thumb_up thumb_down +16

roses are red, violets are blue, i have Alzheimer's, CHEESE ON TOAST

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Holocaust jokes aren't funny

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Did you hear about the man who swam to the bottom of the ocean? He drowned

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Nero, please cut the bull, I know you work for the feds, you are involved with the FBI, I know, but its not my problem, I just do not like you lying to me.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Wiggle wiggle wiggle yeah

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What was Billy for Halloween? A pirate

thumb_up thumb_down +14

An alphabet walks into the post office and asks for a letter. What does the postal worker give the alphabet? Nothing. Alphabets can't walk.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

There are no stupid Questions just stupid people

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops