- What do you call a black pirate? + A Nig-ARRRRRRRRRR - No, a pirate you fucking racist

A man buys a kitten from the store. He gets home, takes it out of its cage, and realizes that it wasn't the kitten he wanted. He then returns to the store and exchanges for the kitten he originally wanted, but then decides to keep both because he is feeling particularly hungry.

tomorrows international kill and orphan day, how meany of the sad bastard's you plan on baking into dough?

What do you call a large group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

24

how much blondes does it take to fix a light bulb 1 to buy the bulb 2 to put it up and 25 to think about what it does

you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

Why couldn't Bruce drive a truck? Cause Bruce was a Fish.

why did the mexican choose to work as a landscaper instead of at taco bell? landscaping pays much better and was a more practical decision in this economy to support his family of 13.

What do you give a sick bird? Tweetment.

How do five Jews get to America? They get their passports and ride a public plane, safely leaving the airport and getting on a taxi to go to their hotel.

A guy walks into a bar, has a drink then leaves.

If your scared of paedophiles..... grow up

Q: What's grey and rocky? A: A grey rocking hair

Please? No.

what is the difference between batman and a black guy. bat man is white

What did Santa Claus say to the young boy on Christmas Day? Santa Claus is a myth, that was actually a pedophile.

How many pancakes does it take to build a doghouse? Pancakes are not a feasible material with which to build a doghouse.

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't, he died like everyone else.

Adam Sandler is still funny ! *cough*

Why did the boy dig a hole in the football field? He was blind and his parents were being quite irresponsible....However someone should probably fill in that hole, as that could be a hazard during a football game.

What's big, black, and girls love to ride on? A horse

What did Abraham lincoln do after getting assassinated? Certainly not riding a bike thats for sure.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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