How do you piss off a teacher? Accuse them of being a pedophile

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A grasshopper walks into a bar... Bartender: "hey we have a drink named after you!" Grasshopper: "What, Kevin?"

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Roses are roses Violets are violets Sugar is sugar And you're a person

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Chrysanthemums our orange violettes are musical

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Q: Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? A: Because drawing a perfect circle is impossible for any human. Actually a perfect circle doesn't exist.

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Two fish are in a tank. One is driving, the other is operating the gun. Two soldiers are in a tank. They both drown.

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What is the difference between a black man and a sofa? A black man is a human being with feelings, while a sofa is an inanimate object that people sit on in order to enjoy comfort and possibly watch television.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Frank. Frank who? Cut the shit, I'm being chased by a tiger!

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What number is funnier than 23? 24.

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Why are black people afraid of white people? They aren't

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Once apon a time, a man read a book. As he started the book, he said ''once apon a time, a man read a book. As he started the book, he said ''once apon a time, a man read a book. As he started the book, he said ''once apon a time, a man read a book ... it goes on forever. Epilogue: the man and son eventually died because a microphone swallowed a frog. THE END P.S.: I didn't close the quotations. P.S.#2: I don't know what ''P.S. stands for. P.S.#3: I didn't close the quotation again.

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Q: If you are running a race and a fridge hits you, how many dogs play x-box in the snow? A: 12 orange waffles

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Knock Knock Come in! :)

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My wife made me a sandwich

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Why can't black people be astronauts? Institutionalized racism.

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What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage..

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Why couldn't the duck fly? It died.

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What did the homeless guy say to the not-homeless guy? I'm homeless.

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Fifteen out of twenty therapists is great, but five are left out.

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Your momma's so stupid that she was declared mentally retarded by her doctors.

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This is the worst anti-joke on the entire site. Just look at all the thumbs down!

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What do you call a man with bananas in his ears? A doctor. He is clearly mentally unstable, and probably in pain.

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Q: What was Steve Jobs' last words before he died? A: I Think i might die.

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What state is round on both ends and high in the middle? Ocoloradoo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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