Why did the chicken cross the road? Okay, seriously I'm done. I try to make a joke but I don't think I can do it anymore. I'm not funny I'm just a little coward who offers nothing to life. I should just kill myself. Fuck this joke, fuck you.

What do you call a monkey lost in a desert? A donkey who was forgotten by his owner.

What did Delaware? A coat.

Q. Dr.evil? JHHHHHHHHOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN

UP

What does Obama, the President of the United States of America see when he closes his eyes? His eyelids

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

why did the man paint his house? cause he never wanted to mow the lawn

Q. Why did the squirrel cross the road? A. Because it was stapled to the chicken.

What happens when you mix a camel and a penguin? A cenguin!

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn’t get to cross the road. Halfway through the crossing, it was hit by a car and turned into roadkill. Then a family of black people picked it up and turned it into fried chicken.

Leo! Leo get over here before i abuse you. Okay, im going to my whip.

How did the girl get her Mardi Gras beads? She purchased them at a reasonable price from a party store.

how do you confuse a blonde? shes already confused Leave.Her.Alone.

Guess what? Bananas

Whats the best thing about chuck norris? he's chuck norris.

Actually it was me Josh brown

Knock Knock. Who's There? The Landlord. Your rent's late.

a duck, a mexican, a camel, a jew, a duck, a moose, an asian, an ostrich, a turtle, an elephant, a scorpion, two vampires, a pokemon, your mom, Stephen Hawkings, a bird, a plane, mario, your family, and a plumber walk into a bar. They have cancer, AIDS, disabilties, diabetes, herpes, siezures, retardation, death in their families, drug addiction, no arms or legs, no home, no money, racial segregation, and have been raped. A combination of which is worse than the holocaust and three bee stings and a rope that fails.

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one underneath it. What's worse than that? It has to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It goes back for seconds.

6 was afraid of 7 because 7 8 9

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Because the light was green.

so a jew walks into a bar and leaves at 9:00 becuase he has work in the morning.

women's rights

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...