Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Why didn't Sally get back up? She had no legs Guess who's getting prosthetic legs for Christmas! Not Sally.

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Yo momma so fat she should be concerned of contracting Coronary Heart Disease, high blood pressure, type 2 diabetes, abnormal blood fats, metabolic syndrome, cancer, osteoarthritis, sleep apnea, or even obesity hypoventilation syndrome

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Sorry babe, even if I was I would not tell you, the entire place is surrounded, but within enough of a distance, so we will plant a nice setup around the green shack so everyone assumes his deal was some solo operation, if someone else is heading at his direction now, you are gonna get busted, so you better stay down.

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What do you call a black Englishmen? Rodger

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What do you call a man floating in a pool with his arms chopped off? A murder victim.

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A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share private information with a stranger.

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whats it called when a pimp slaps a ho? RESPECT

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Why did Little Billy trip? Because I shot his foot off.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? No one. No one who? Cares.

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Q.What's green and smells like grass??? A. Grass

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whats worse than 10 babies in a blender 1 baby in 10 blenders

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Why did you fall? Because of my buttcrack.

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a kid was born with down syndrome on christmas night

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What did the boy born with cancer get for christmas? ... More cancer

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how do you tell a politician that you hate him? politicians can be female, too.

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A spanish comedian walked into a bar. He was on time for his act.

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What did the giraffe say to the human? Nothing, but it was trying to alert the human of an oncoming bus.

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What has 4 black legs, a green back, and will kill you if it falls on you? A pool table.

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If at first you don't succeed, there's a very substantial probability that you failed.

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A blonde walked into a bar.

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hey i jut met u, and i have alzeihmer, cheese and toast

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What kind of key can unlock a banana? Basically any key that is sharp enough.

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Roses are red, Violets are brown, F*** who's had a shit in my garden.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It couldnt because a chicken was obscuring its path.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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