I work at jcpenny

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What do you call the man with no arms and no legs? Jeff. Because that's his ****ing name.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Given the unlikely circumstance in which an elephant actually does sit on your fence, it is equally unlikely said elephant would be able to do so unseen by witnesses, of whom you may ask what time the event occurred. Assuming your witness thought to look at the time befor calling animal control.

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whats funnier than a dead musim? a guy who begs a girl to go out with him for 16 hours

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So three Jews walk into a Biker Bar. Despite the fact that is was a self-proclaimed "Biker Bar", the group of men inside were in fact rather open-minded, and had no issues with new members. They had a rich conversation, and frequented the bar thereafter.

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why did the Mexican shoot himself? because his wife miscarried, hung herself, and his oldest brother had cancer. also when he was 5, his parents died in a car accident, leaving his abusive uncle to care for him. he also had erectile dysfunction which caused him severe pain. did i mention he was an illegal, homeless immigrant who was addicted to methamphedimine and owed several million dollars to a man who repeatedly raped him anally? he was.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Roses are red...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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How could you wake up Lady Gaga? poke her face

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My name is Harry.

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How many dinosaurs does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well, if you're talking about T. Rexes, you can forget about it! Their arms are too short to do anything! They can't even beat off!

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What's red and the size of a packet of crisps? A Miscarriage

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Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? It got hit by a stone. Why did the second Koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by the first Koala. Why did the third Koala fall out of the tree? It thought it was a game. Why did the Kangaroo die? It was hit by three falling Koalas.

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People just dont care about me, yesterday I got a coconut in my head and... AWWWW thats horrible! Yeah I... So did the coconut make it?

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Knock knock whos there telephone telephone who telephone refiridgerator

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What's brown, no one likes and has had a bad history? Dog poop

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What did the Jew say to the German? He said hello.

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How many Chinese people does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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What's the difference between a black businessman and a white businessman? Their skin colour.

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When do you know when to stop making anti- jokes? when your done with your joke and click submit.

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chuck norris's daughter lost her virginity but he got it back

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im jackson, i have a small willy, and like to finger my dog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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