What did the convicted necrophiliac pedophile do when he found a dead baby? He reported it to the authorities because despite his past habits and behaviour, and after years of rehabilitation he became a responsible and considerate citizen

Whats the difference between a walnut and a baby ? Ones fun to hit with a hammer and the other is a walnut

What did the adverb say to the noun? Hopefully whale.

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a sludge hammer, the other is a watermelon

Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Cause he's dead.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers

How did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room.

Why did robin get in the batmobile? Batman told him to

A guy walks into a bar. He now has a broken collar bone.

A: How do you make a fire with two sticks? B: Ask your mother, we did it last night.

OneBigAssMistakeAmerica

There once was a man named Joe. Joe had AIDS, and killed all his friends and family The End, now go back to bed, pussy

roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme this one doesn't

Whats plastic and phonie a phone

A black guy and a white girl are walking toward each other in a dark alley. Which one takes off his/her clothes first? The black guy as he is closer to home and therefore closer to his bathroom where he took a shower after a hard day's work.

a black guy walks into a bar and the bartender says "get out of here, whites only" this joke takes place in the 1950's when african americans were discriminated against

Knock Knock Who's There? God God who.....wait REALLY? No Dave, this is a hallucination, and your peeing right now.

Tim tebow is the anti christ

A man walks in to a bar. He was hospitalized and died later that day.

Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

Why did the blonde driver crossed the red light? Because she has a good notion of physics and realized that the truck that was behind her was too fast to stop in time and if she braked there could have been an accident.

how do you kill a bear. -you shoot it.

do you know a really good joke? i don't have one.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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