What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing Jenga on September 11th.

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You know how hitler wasn't accepted into the art school ? The teacher who didn't let him join was Jewish .

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What does a camel wear at war? Camelflage

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What's the difference between gun and penis? A child doesn't start to cry when gun shoots in its mouth.

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A black man walks into a convienent store, pays for his stuff and leaves

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why was the kid crying his dad is a alchoholic

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Chuck Norris is dead......

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What did the hispanic man say to the black man? I don't know, if I was listening to their conversation, the would be creepy.

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Andrew's a bald wankstain.

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Why did the old man cry? Because he had just witnessed his wife die.

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How do you know if an elephant has been in your fridge? If it is laying in pieces around the crumbled wreckage of your house. [L]

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A man went to the doctor, complaining about not feeling well after dancing the night before. The doctor quickly rushed to the surgeon to get ready for the liver transplant that had to take place.

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A man comes home to find his wife in bed with another man. He then joins them.

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what do blondes and rocks have in common? they are both material and have extension.

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What is better then winning the special olympics? Not being retarded

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a carpet? I don't sell carpets.

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A mercenary was sent from the US to kill a terrorist leader. He was captured by the terrorists but wouldn't give away any information. They beat him, shocked him, cut him, and punched him in a dark room with a light beaming right down on him like a spotlight. It was a grueling five long days until they said "We know you have the information we want, tell us or you will die!" The mercenary sat in silence. They took out a gun and pointed it to his head. The mercenary then broke down and told the terrorists the information they wanted to hear. The terrorists then shot him to death.

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There was a man that invited his uncle, his uncle his uncle his uncle, his uncle and his uncle spidey to a party. He was really dissapointed when he realized that not only was his invitation full of typos, but that he invited Peter Parker twice and forgot to invite spiderman.

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Why was the man eaten by a tiger? Because tigers are carnivores, but why are they carnivores? Because they eat meat.

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What can move people but not rocks.. Poop

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What do you get when you cross a squirrel and lasagna? I don't know,I'm asking you the question.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas?... A warm meal, a shower, and a place to sleep courtesy of the local homeless unit.

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Why was the math book crying? Three men just brutally raped his wife.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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