why did the fat lady hop on one foot,because she lost the other foot to diabetes. ?

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James Patrick Campbell

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Choir.

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Fine Nero, but I will be keeping an eye on you.

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why did the monkey cross the road? it escaped from a local zoo a block away

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Roses are red, violets are red, everything's red... Retinal haemorrhage.

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A boy is eating with his family. A man in the next booth tells him "You are very handsome and you will be a movie star when you grow up." Then the man leaves. On the way out, the boy's mom says "You know he was drunk, right?"

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How do you make a black man cry? Stab his wife.

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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What did the guy say when he came out of the closet? Where's my green shirt?

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Knock Knock! whos there? Me! I kill you!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get KFC... Because hes a canibal!

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What does a dyslexic person do on sundays? Goes to church to pray to Dog

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Knock Knock *Opens door* Hi John, you got here right on time!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? monkey see monkey do why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? it lost its footing why did the girl fall down? she was hit by four monkeys and a refridgerator

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Where's Waldo? The cemetery, he died last week.

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whats the stage after cancer? you die

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Yo momma's so fat, she's broke 'cause she spent too much money on food.

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a dyslexic made a dessert. it was a bit dry.

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What did the man do when the woman broke up with him? He changed his facebook status to single.

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Q: What did jerry sandusky do with little boys alone? A: Teach them how to play football

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Knock knock Who's there? What are you, blind?

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Why did the blonde commit suicide? Because she hated her life.

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Whats worse than peeing blood? Dying.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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