Roses are red Zombies are hungry and blue My brain is half-eaten And what about you?

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse doesn't reply because horses don't speak. However, he is confused and scared by the unfamiliar surroundings. Trying to escape, the horse breaks his leg. The horse must be put down.

A: Do you like it B: No

What's worse than no wifi Nothing.

what did the african boy get for christmas - not food

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems make sense. 5

How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Only one and it is politically incorrect to assume otherwise.

Why did the black man give his seat to a white man? Because the white man had a leg injury, and the black man was being a courteous good samaritan.

A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" the Eggman and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

why did the little girl eat grapes? because she felt like it.

Stoner Student: "Imagine if El Nino and La Nina got together and started a family and had little Los Ninos." Class Nerd: "Yeah."

why didnt Timmy get anything for Christmas?His mom told santa he was very naughty that year

Roses are lamp, Violets are squirrel, I have ADHD, LET'S DANCE!

How many Caucasian American males does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

What's green, grows in my basement, and if fun to smoke? Mold. I lied about it being fun to smoke.

Why did the blonde walk into the men's restroom? Because the blonde was a man who needed to expel his feculent waste.

a man walked into a bar because he needed a part time job to support his family.

what do you call an arse bandit? lady gaga's tanning salon attendants 3rd cousins dog chauffeur, roberto

anal seepage

why did the chicken cross the road? it didnt it got hit by a bus.

Why is chad so gay? Its his choice.

can the real slim shady please stand up? no. there is a slim shady in all of us, so we will all stand up.

If life throws you lemons, throw them back and ask for some water because lemonade only makes you thirstier due to the large amounts of sugar used.

What's black and dangerous? A fridge, I lied about the black part.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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