How long did the Hundred Years' War last? 116 years.

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Why didn't the boy cross the street? He didn't have legs

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why doesnt bally lifeguard he isnt qualified

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What does a Jew and an oven have in common? Bagels.

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door.

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What did Batman say to Robin before going into the Batmobile? Get in the car.

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How do you get your girlfriend to become more enthusiastic about swallowing? Stick your dick in Ben & Jerry's Cherry Garcia ice cream.

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What do you call a handyman with no arms? By his name.

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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knock knock whos there? IRS Oh....

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How do you prank a blind man? Uou leave the plunger in the toilet.

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What did the Protoss player say when he lost to a Terran player? I concede defeat. You simply have a greater mastery over the game than I.

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Guy finds lamp in the desert and rubs it three times. No genie appears because there's no such thing as magic.

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Whats better than ten dead babys in one trashcan??? One dead baby in ten trashcans.

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What do you call a tennis match between Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder? An anachronistic hypothetical sporting event that would never happen.

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Why did the guy jump out of the plane? he was parachuting

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a man reads his wife a poem "roses are red, violets are blue, and I love you." the wife talks to her brother asking why he changed the poem he said men do that cause they love you. later that night she got pregnant.

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A man walk to the store and buys some clothes.

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Women's rights.

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roses are red violets are blue if i had a gun i would shoot you

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A dozen burly firefighters ready to stick it in your pooper

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How do you get a Hooker Wet? Dump her in a River.

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Tunechi

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Whats worse than not having cellphone service? Having sex unwillingly with a stranger then getting pregnant at the age of 13.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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