You're mama's so ugly, she will most-likely never meet a compatible mate and die alone.

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How you learn to juggle? You ask someone for their balls.

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That moment when you and your friends throw snowballs at cars in the dark on the highway and the cops spotlight your area while you hide in a shed...

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a shed? A: Considering babies are incapable of rational thought it is unlikely they would understand how to employ the correct method to paint.

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Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

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How was copper wire invented? Probably some scientist did that

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Did you hear the one about the Gay Irish Politician who was running for President?! He withdrew his candidacy.

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Why is Jem no longer a cartoon? Because they all died from toxic hairspray.

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170

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Why did the black man get a life sentence in prison? Because he was involved a mass stabbing in a night club London which saw 4 local teenage girls lose there lives.

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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Two muffins are in an oven. Muffin 1: Gosh it's hot in here. Muffin 2: Holy Crap! A talking muffin!

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A man enters a bar, and says: "It is impossible to drown in an elevator" This is incorrect.

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Why did the taxi driver kill the blond? He didn't. It's illegal to murder people in most countries.

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Yo momma so fat she was baptized in a church, because she wasn't as fat as she is currently.

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Why did the bear stick his head in the honey comb? He wanted honey.

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Why did the Mexican wait outside Home Depot all day? He was hoping to be hired as day-labor to provide for his family.

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An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have a few drinks, then go to a club, where they amuse each other and those around them by completely slurring their words in their already very strong regional accents. Then they get a taxi back to the house of the Englishman as he lives nearest, and stay the night. The next morning, the Scotsman and the Irishmen walk home as they are still hungover and do not wish to risk driving.

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Why couldn't the boy see? He was dead

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Person A: Hey! Whats up? Person B: Suicide rates...

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Q: What's green has four legs and would kill you if it fell off a roof and hit you? A: A pool table.

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knock knock who's there? Kallie Kallie who? sorry, wrong house

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What do you call a Mexican jumping fences? A really good athlete.

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What is worse than getting a 30% on a test? Getting a 29% on a test.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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