How the hell did Susie get on the swing anyway I don't know you tell me?

thumb_up thumb_down -33

rosses are red violets are blue poems are hard alligator

thumb_up thumb_down +106

An impolite guy walks into a bar... and doesn't apologize to the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

if a bra is called a over the shoulder boulder holder what is male underware called sincerly, under the butt nut hut

thumb_up thumb_down +46

What do you call two black guys flying a plane? Pilots.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

A theif walks into a blonde ladies apartment. The theif takes all of her valuable belongings, leaving her life in shambles.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

read down and see what it is like BEFOR MARRIAGE boy:at last.i can hardly wait! girl:do you want to leave me? boy:NO! dont even think about it! girl:do you love me? boy:ofcourse! always girl:have you ever cheated on me? boy:NO! why are you even asking? girl:will you kiss me ? boy:every chance i get! girl:will you hit me ? boy:hell no! are you crazy ? girl:can i trust you? boy:yes! girl:darling!! read up again and see what it is like AFTER MARRIAGE (L.W)

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What's the difference between a dead baby in my garage and a Ferrari in my garage? I don't have a Ferrari.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

How do you make a dead baby float? -you take your foot off its head.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's the difference between a joke and an anti joke Bananas

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Oh

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How is nothing something if it is nothing?...

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Sarah Palin

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you're just a figment of my imagination.\

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Knock knock. Who's ther? Your friend Billy i've been shot and need help

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Guy 1: So who did you have sex with? Guy 2: I was Fucking Austria. Guy 1: What do you mean? Guy 2: Look it up.

thumb_up thumb_down +145

why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

thumb_up thumb_down +83

What do you call 2 midgets and a pencil rolling down a hill? Satan

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Why did the panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second panda fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first panda. Why did the third panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the fourth panda fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. -BG_Shank_A

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What did Pittsburgh say to Philadelphia? .........Lightbulb.........

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Whats white, black, and red all over? A half eaten penguin

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did the Leah say to the Pawneez? AWWWW YEAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Michael J. Fox asked me if I wanted my drink shaken or stirred, did I really have a choice?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man enters a bar, and says: "It is impossible to drown in an elevator" This is incorrect.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops